chat idiocy

i am a statistic.

yes, i am guilty. yes, i was once one of those people constantly staring on the monitor chatting till the next morning without any sleep whatsoever to somebody in the other side of the world whom i thought as someone i loved. yikes! whenever i remember those days, i laugh at myself. i don't know what got into me but at those times, i felt enamoured with his words on the screen and with everything about him that's just so full of mystery. i literally dropped everything in my life just to be with him. that was then. that was when i was such a naive woman.

yes, i would have loved to shoot myself-of-then now.

after that experience, i vowed never to get involved with someone over the net. friends, yes. but to even try to think of some romantic thing, that i would never do again. it wasn't only a waste of my time, it was a waste of my life. again, i mean that literally. i wouldn't go over the details as it's a chapter i would like to keep to myself. no i would never forget it. how could i? 3 years ago, i fell in love with someone on the net, or so i thought, and it cost me my life. yes, my life, my future. it was a big mistake.

i'd like to think i have been forgiven for that mistake. i have repented and i am also slowly forgiving myself. the good breaks that i am getting these days are surely indications that God has forgiven me. i just have my own self to get over to. in time. slowly. surely.

right now, i have heard of 3 people succumbing to this chat idiocy. they met this person on chat, thinks he/she loves this person, and throws their life into that person's hands. i mean for gawd's sake, you haven't even seen the guy/gal and you're thinking of marrying him/her? (at least i got to meet my guy, and thus made my idiocy more real!! duh?!?!!)

what more? times have also changed. some people has made chat into a cheap sex shop. they chat and meet and have sex. simple as that. they go into this enigmatic motive of friendship and yet in the back of their minds, if and whenever they will meet, something will happen. just a matter of when. it's like a given. let's meet. let's fuck.

i have a liberal mind. but growing up with values (there are still some left, hehe), growing up in a catholic school, it is hard not to feel guilty and feel small whenever i see people that are too too much liberated. i am just not that.

but who can blame them? everything is relative to your own morality. i can't judge them. like i said, i have an open mind. if they're happy with what they're doing, as long as they come to be responsible of whatever consequenses of their actions are, i raise my hands.

way to go man/girl!

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the author still chats occasionally. she goes by bardot on mirc and biatchychic on yahoo chat. she hates and doesn't respond to the question asl?