battery empty

i told my phonebuddy na maghiwalay na kami.. errr, i mean lalayo na ako. nakalimutan ko, di pala kami mag-on. hehe.. i thought it was a helpless case kaya nag surrender na ako. i told him my feelings and then said my goodbye. natapos usapan namin around 8pm. nakatulugan ko yung break-up namin... errr, paglayo ko pala. i woke up around midnight kasi ihing-ihi ako. chatted with some friends for awhile para ibalita yung break-up namin... errr, yung decision kong paglayo. then tulog ulit after a few minutes.

i called in sick today. i'm not really sick physically, but emotionally, i'm so drained. i know i'm just going to have a hard day at work so i decided to just skip it. it's not worth another headache to what i have right now - if there is such a thing.

here's some surprise today. after our talk last night, kala ko di na kami mag-uusap ever. pero he sent me a private message. so usap na naman kami. this time he asked if i want to be his gf. whatdafuck! antagal kong hinintay na itanong nya sa akin yan nung araw pero di masabisabi. ngayon pa na mahirap nang paniwalaan. why now? dahil nasabi ko nang mahal ko siya? ngayon pa siya mag aaylabyu dahil sinabi ko na ring lab ko siya? he's playing me so darn much. sapakin ko kaya siya? anong kala niya sa akin? sirang sira? kainis. di ko sinagot tanong niya. lumabas lahat ng cynical thoughts ko. sinabi ko lahat. ngayon pa ba ako mahihiya? ngayong pang wala na akong itinatago? i know naguguluhan siya. kasi gusto niya ganun pa rin kami ng dati. kasi ayaw niyang lumayo ako. and he thinks he can get me by asking me to be his gf. potah! baka mag work nga. hahaha.

di natapos usapan namin. nasa work kasi siya. to be continued daw mamaya. suspense na naman.

makapaligo na nga. it's 1pm and i smell shit.