why is it that when you're trying mighty hard to forget someone, that someone suddenly pesters you. and just when you thought you have gained your balance back, you remember the past - the long sweet talks, the good times. and when you haven't gotten over the past just yet, i bet you'd still probably hate him - like i'm hating him right now. grrrr! just when i thought i'm over him, he goes on telling me i'm very special? pakhim!
this past couple of days has been total hypocrisy from me. i don't know what happened but i suddenly missed him. great eh!?! with nothing much to do, i was lost in my own world again, thinking of him, thinking that perhaps, we still have some chance. and i hate myself for going back to that thought again.
memo to self: IT'S OVER! MOVE ON!!!
i need my shrink!!!
pastor? where are you? if you're reading this, please help. i need your words of wisdom my friend. =)
i didn't get any sleep last night. i so missed him i almost attempted calling him. i'm just glad to know that i didn't gave in to my craving. these are times when i'm thankful to have so much pride. i probably would have killed myself this morning have i called him. hehe.. now there goes my old self!
okay. i now know what to do.
deleted his name in all my contact lists.
deleted his number in my celfon.
deleted his email in my address book.
deleted his yahoo id.
problem is, i know them all by heart.
oh well. at least i'm trying. and i'll be praying hard for His help and guidance. ayokong matuliro ulit. hehehe.
i wish for my peace back.
good luck to me.
how pathetic is this? i have been staring at the note he sent me for about an hour now. it has only 55 letters - which includes my name, his name and the word love. jeez! i know i'm pathetic. i'm indulging myself tonight as tomorrow everything is gonna be out of sight. i hope that will help me keep him out of my mind... and heart.
wag na wag mong sasabihin
na hindi mo nadama
itong pag-ibig kong
handang ibigay
kahit pa kalayaan mo
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i thought of not writing these thoughts here but i thought this might also help me ease my pain. and it did. =)
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